Swami's NFL Pool 2018: The Root of the Week VIII

November 1, 2015

The Root of the Week VIII

In looking at the emails this morning, it seems there was an issue with the Update Email this week. Apologies, apologies, I will send out an expedited update email this week so you all have information. If you did not receive this past week's email, let me know when you respond to this next one.

A season characterized by people moving in different directions sees another week of darts thrown on the football map. The Falcons, Rams, Cardinals, Texans, Chargers, and Panthers seem like the big plays of the week, with a small smattering of extras thrown in for good measure.

As for Darth Bennett, as he sits down to watch not football, but the latest episode of Rebels, he is feeling very jungle-ish, and seeks to ride the Bagheera wave into Week Nine. The black Panthers for the black Darth, and on we merrily roll.

That is all.

Introducing . . .

. . . Ze German, a frothy, filthy, unfiltered 'Skins-lover bringing you weekly rants from his tapestry-laden castle high upon the Zugspitze peak. There is wisdom and method to his madness, however, so pay attention -- just look out for the women and children.

. . . The Holy Light, and the best of us, a beacon of strength, dignity, and truth, and shining where there is darkness. As it was in Ezekiel, his word is his bond and his name is the law, and he shall strike down those who dare not listen when he doth speak.

. . . The Hooded Fiend, brilliant, diabolical, devious -- the smartest man you've never met, and will never have the chance. Locked away in the dungeons below a nondescript building, we only bring the Fiend out to post when the situation is most dire.

. . . El Doctor, the tall, dark, hunky, and handsome resident surgeon of Suicide. Women love his strong hands, men respect his keen mind, and Swami requires his wicked wit, but no one understands his almost unholy passion for autos and linen pants.

. . . Man of Wench, that staunch fan of all things Philly and a fine specimen of masculinity, bold enough to tie the knot with the feisty, infamous Wench. Whether at the grill or at the bar, with a healthy glass of vino in his hand he'll bill you by the hour for a taste of his good times.

. . . Master of Macabre, a delightfully sinful and sinister purveyor of doom and gloom, keeper of all things dark and deathly. It is unsure what horrifies more: his spectral air, his cadaverous crypt, his Machiavellian machinations, or his penchant for Princess and the Frog.

. . . Shapeshifter, he of the ever-changing ways, ever-shifting forms, and everlasting enthusiasm. Our newest commentator brings forth pomp, verbosity, and circumstance on scale to rival even the Swami himself. Shifty, yes, and subtle when necessary, his form is never out of fashion.