Swami's NFL Pool 2018: Thursday Taunt III

September 25, 2014

Thursday Taunt III

When does the Tuesday Taunt become the Thursday Taunt? When the Swami sleeps through the first part of the week after having suffered an insufferable Sunday in which all but four emerged unscathed.

Four. Four losses only.

I am rooting for you all to see Week Five, when the scythe is sharpest and the bitter chaos is so sweet upon my lips, but this is a little ridiculous. Even the Cowboys won, which is saying something.

Weekly Statistics
192 participants
87 undefeated
79 with one loss
26 deceased

I imagine Week Four will be far, far different. I am already hearing rumblings that there are those of you bold enough to break that most sacred of rules, Rule #3. How did that turn out for you in Week Two? Ah yes. Very well then, like the Lobster Thermador, I recommend it, señor.

That is all.

Introducing . . .

. . . Ze German, a frothy, filthy, unfiltered 'Skins-lover bringing you weekly rants from his tapestry-laden castle high upon the Zugspitze peak. There is wisdom and method to his madness, however, so pay attention -- just look out for the women and children.

. . . The Holy Light, and the best of us, a beacon of strength, dignity, and truth, and shining where there is darkness. As it was in Ezekiel, his word is his bond and his name is the law, and he shall strike down those who dare not listen when he doth speak.

. . . The Hooded Fiend, brilliant, diabolical, devious -- the smartest man you've never met, and will never have the chance. Locked away in the dungeons below a nondescript building, we only bring the Fiend out to post when the situation is most dire.

. . . El Doctor, the tall, dark, hunky, and handsome resident surgeon of Suicide. Women love his strong hands, men respect his keen mind, and Swami requires his wicked wit, but no one understands his almost unholy passion for autos and linen pants.

. . . Man of Wench, that staunch fan of all things Philly and a fine specimen of masculinity, bold enough to tie the knot with the feisty, infamous Wench. Whether at the grill or at the bar, with a healthy glass of vino in his hand he'll bill you by the hour for a taste of his good times.

. . . Master of Macabre, a delightfully sinful and sinister purveyor of doom and gloom, keeper of all things dark and deathly. It is unsure what horrifies more: his spectral air, his cadaverous crypt, his Machiavellian machinations, or his penchant for Princess and the Frog.

. . . Shapeshifter, he of the ever-changing ways, ever-shifting forms, and everlasting enthusiasm. Our newest commentator brings forth pomp, verbosity, and circumstance on scale to rival even the Swami himself. Shifty, yes, and subtle when necessary, his form is never out of fashion.