The Root of the Week XI

There are many excellent things in this world associated with the number 43. I shall list a few for you - seven to be exact, and naturally of course, as seven is the sum of 4 and 3.

1) Richard Petty's car.

2) The world's number one Spanish liqueur. 

3) The battled-tested Glock.

4) The largest non-McNugget number.

5) The Princess 43.

6) Troy Polamalu's number*.

And last but certainly not least ...

7) The number of remaining participants in the Swami pool. Yes, we have 43 brave souls remaining - an astoundingly high number given the pace we were on but a couple weeks ago. And yet ... and yet ... here we are nonetheless.

There are still a handful of multiples alive, as well - that is to say, participants with multiple entries still alive. The Swami himself is one: Factor, Spawn, and Darth all still beat their hearts proudly and with all the passion they can muster up.

Still - it is difficult to win one's own pool and so it is time to take some calculated (read: wildly entertaining and likely to fail) chances. The Spawn has drawn the short stick.

Therefore, it is my pleasure and honor to announce that the selection for Week Eleven of the Spawn of Swami shall be . . . the mighty, mighty Cleveland Browns. Yes, you heard right - the Spawn is taking a flying leap off a very short cliff and banking on just that one win by Cleveland at home against the up and down Jags. Up and down, up and down, but the down would have to be DOWN for Spawn to stay alive.

Darth and the Factor will, in the meantime, stay the present competitive course: 'tis the Chiefs for them, along with many others. Most of the action is on Kansas City, along with a smattering of Saints, Chargers (?!), and Jaguars. Only the Spawn has taken the Browns - and I mean not just this week, but the entire season.

Are you not entertained?

That is all.




*You just did not know it due to his awesomely excessive hair.

The Root of the Week VIII

This is a difficult week. It is a difficult week, a dastardly week, laborious and burdensome and loathsome. It is an ugly, low down, dirty, knock-down, drag-out, all-around, and altogether ... dare I say it ... HATEFUL week. Fitting, given it is Week the Eighth. Tarantino has vision and the world wears bifocals, and though they be more often as not tinted red, 'tis a splendid vision, indeed.

And so it falls to you, the participants, to look down the list and pick the least of all evils. There is no choice comes not without risk. There are no locks this hateful week eight, there are no "gimme" games or "sure thing" selections. It is survive at all costs, sponsored by Jimmie Dimmick.

Let us discuss the matchups, one by one:

Jags @ Titans ... Completed already, not that anyone who has been a part of this pool for any length of time would ever pick the Titans to beat the Jags. This matchup several years back was cause for one of the greatest upsets in Swami Pool history; 70 participants took the Titans to win ... and they lost. 'Twas also a crowning Swami achievement. Would've also broken the division game rule.

Skins @ Bengals ... Logic dictates this to be one of the better matchups this week. No rules broken, one of the few this can be said about. And yet ... Skins have shown great flashes and sit 4-3, while the Bengals has shown the reverse and sit 3-4. No one would feel great about this one. Swami Sayeth: Bengals 27, Skins 23.

Jets @ Browns ... No one would take the 0-7 Browns to win, would they? No one would take the 2-5 Jets to win on the road, would they? Because Cleveland, maybe, but remember the Tribe is up 3-1. Swami Sayeth: Browns 20, Jets 19. Darth Bennett likes to live dangerously: Cleveland to win.

Seahawks @ Saints ... Is anyone willing to take the Seahawks traveling cross country on the road? Feel like picking against Brees against a banged up Seattle secondary? No broken rules, just broken dreams for the ones who elect to select this one. Swami Sayeth: Saints 27, Seahawks 16.

Cards @ Panthers ... Hope it doesn't come down to a field goal. Panthers are 1-5 and sputtering, but coming off a bye. The Cards have struggled, but still have weapons galore. Swami Sayeth: Cardinals 30, Panthers 20.

Pats @ Bills ... Rules, rules, rules. Bills cannot beat Patriots twice, can they? With Brady back and lighting things up? Pats are on the road against a team that is in their head. Good luck finding your way with this one. Swami Sayeth: Pats 34, Bills 23.

Raiders @ Bucs ... Meh. Swami Sayeth: Raiders 19, Bucs 17.

Chiefs @ Colts ... Reid's boys seem like the logical pick ... they are just on the road. Swami Says: Chiefs 24, Colts 23.

Lions @ Texans ... The best game no one will watch. Lots of scoring, I think, in this one. No one can really trust the Texans, can the Lions be trusted on the road? Swami Sayeth: Lions 33, Texans 19. If you've gotta pick a winner, make it a Lion, says the Factor.

Chargers @ Denver ... Breaks a divison rule and no one ever likes betting for or against the Chargers. Should be a game the Broncos win. Why, then, are my palms sweating? Swami Sayeth: Broncos 17, Chargers 16. The Swami himself takes the Broncos to win.

Packers @ Falcons ... Good luck with either of these teams. Have no idea what to expect so this one's a full shot in the dark. Swami Sayeth: Falcons 31, Packers 30.

Eagles @ Cowboys ... Division rivalry, two top teams, Dak vs Carson. Too many storylines, just one matters. Swami Sayeth: Boys 24, Eagles 20.

Vikings @ Bears ... Who wants to wait until Monday, really. Division game. Favored team on the road. So many rules to break, so little time. No one will actually pick the Bears, of course, but Vikings are a hard pill to swallow. Swami Sayeth Upset Special: Bears 23, Vikings 18.

Only the Swami remains undefeated; the Factor and Darth have one loss apiece, and Mama Bear lives no more. Once again, we roll Browns, Lions, and Broncos. When has that trifecta EVER hit on the same weekend? Good luck to everyone on this hateful, hateful week.

That is all.

The Root of the Week VIII

As we near the Week 10 marker, when the season really gets real, when the noose tightens and the claws come out, it behooves to remind participants of how precious time really is. Once eliminated, 'tis another ten long months to the start of the Suicide Pool for 2015, when a fresh batch of hope springs eternal.

The crystal ball has proven worthy thus far and the Swami and his brood will look to improve upon their successes in Week Eight, along with the other 25 undefeateds. Most action seems to be coming in this fine weekend on the Cowboys of Dallas, breaking the rule of divisional rivals, with secondary action on the Beloveds to best the improving-but-still-hapless Kitties of Jacksonville.

The Swami has already utilized the Beloveds, of course, trusting their competency long before this point, likewise the spouse and offspring. The brood will, therefore, go in four different directions: the spouse on the Swashbucklers, the girl on the Browns, the boy putting his faith in Bootleg's heir and riding the Cowboys with the masses, and the Swami himself settling down for a round of vision-gathering with the shamans of the Chiefs.

Good luck to those who remain as a wave of nostalgia washes over in honor of those who have fallen. It serves as another stark reminder: like sands through the hourglass, so pass the weeks of the Suicide season.

That is all.