The Root of the Week IV

Oh, what to do, what to do.

There are two clear choices this week, two lock pick-of-the-weeks that will advance participants to Week the Fifth. And yet . . . and yet . . . which to choose . . .

The Seahawks are at home, which means they will have an extra 12th Man on the field. The Falcons are at home, and steamrolling everyone. Neither pick breaks rules, neither opponent presents any challenges.

Flip a coin? No sir, the Swami shall utilize the crystal ball and look forward all the way through Week Nine, and the end of playoff implications. Which team will be needed in later weeks on a greater scale? Atlanta has good matchups farther down the road. The choice, therefore, is clear.

The Flying Hawks of the Sea, it is; Swami and Clan rolls with you en masse.

That is all.

Friday Taunt III

There is no point to argue: the man is the GOAT. This is of course coming from an unabashed Marino lover; #13 is the best pure thrower of all-time, but cannot be the GOAT with the RINGS. Bradshaw, Montana, Elway, Manning, etc, etc, etc. If someone wants to make a strong case for Otto Graham, I'm all ears. But Brady is the GOAT - and I do not see anyone dethroning him. It's a very exclusive company that is allowed to call Tom Brady; as Kobe says, he'll pick up on the fifth ring. 

More magic in Foxboro as the masses avoid a massive scything; we still drop-kicked a fair number. Twenty-seven fell victim in Week Three to the Broncos, Panthers, Seahawks, Steelers, Ravens, and yes even my Beloveds felled a fair few.

Week Three Stats
159 participants
101 undefeated
47 with one loss
11 deceased

Week Four is right around the corner - a fair few have already advanced with a Thursday night Packers win. It is on the rest of us to join them.

That is all.

The Root of the Week III

An early Root this week, Week the Third, as Swami does not know what his wireless capabilities will be come Saturday night as he will be meditating in a hut in the middles of the Himalayas, looking for enlightenment and a small spec of a sense of what will transpire in weeks to come in this most excellent NFL 2017 season.

One thing to be banked on fully? New England will not lost two games in a row at home.

Do you think the Houston Texans are already game planning for Week Four, just because this weekend is likely to be such a catastrophe? Perhaps they think they would be better served preparing for Tennessee?

The Swami moves en masse on the Patriots -- Swami, Spawn, Lady Avery, Factor, and Darth -- and feels extremely happy to be advancing to Week Four.

That is all.

Friday Taunt II

Very little action in Week Two, thanks in large part to a pair of West Coast teams: the Raiders and Seahawks accounted for 79% of participant selections ... to great and glorious success. The remaining 21% took their chances on other squads, mostly victoriously.

Week Two Stats

159 participants

118 undefeated

40 with one loss

1 deceased

Sadly, the Back Nine was not kind to Ben's Bengals, Ice went the Rams, Dem Cowboys did not help D-White, Sleepytime the 26th was rendered comatose by the Tiger Stripes, the Giants were not so Rajdandy, and Lushing must have been inebriated to pick against the Beloveds and on the Chargers prior to Week Six, breaking the two most inviolate rules in the process.

Only one participant has fallen ... and we congratulate D-White 03 on claiming the Mr. Irrelevant prize for 2017. The Reaper welcomes you into black-cloaked arms.

That is all.

The Root of the Week II

In by-gone times, it was virtually unheard of for a participant of the Swami Pool to even consider the course of action that so many participants have chosen this week, Week the Second. Silver and Black? 'Twas not a team to be picked, 'twas instead a comely pair of comic book anti-heroines.

*Yes, these are actual comic characters and, yes, they are slated for their own movie as a spin-off of the Spider-Man cinematic universe. But I digress.

The smart money is coming in fast and furious on the Raidahs, pick after pick in email after email ... Raiders, Raiders, Raiders. There are two teams currently that break up the litany: Seahawks and Ravens also get a little bit of play. But the Raiders take the cake by wide margin.

The Raiders are good, yes, but this is more a statement methinks on the ineptitude of the J-E-T-S than any particular (circle of) excellence on the part of Carr's Company, but still.

Still.

The Reaper sharpens his scythe this week hoping for one, just one of the chosen three to fall ... he will be pleased if the silver and black or the Gang Green or the Edgar Allen Poe's drop-kick a few participants into the double loss, therefore granting just a little carnage this fine weekend in September.

In other news, the Swami will also go with the group in this Week the Second. He will be parking his faith in none other than the beautiful and semi-unimportant.

That is all, faithful subjects. Bid you adieu, until the morn.

That is all.

Swami

The Inaugural Taunt of 2017 - Week One (I)

It was not, shall we say, the smoothest of first weekends. There has been difficulty in the past for people getting through the first weekend, but when fully 20% of participants succumb to loss one in week one, 'not smooth' is one delicate way to describe it.

Face-smacking, palm-slapping 'of all the gosh darn darn' is another.

Week One Statistics

159 participants

124 sitting pretty at 1-0

35 hoping to run the table henceforth

1 loss for Clan Swami, with Avery of Avalor getting Jaguar-ed

0 deceased, because that would be a true feat

The Pool is off and running. The games have begun.

That is all.

The Root of the Week I

Everyone loves this time of year in football. As Outkast tells us, the world in September is "so fresh and so clean clean." It is glorious time, full of new beginnings and new hopes and dreams. As I myself said last year at this time, there is magic in the air -- the kind of magic only the fall can bring.

Ladies and gentlemen, glorious individuals, heroes, villains, lovers, and friends, I bid you welcome once more to the halls of the Swami Pool. Allow myself to introduce myself, your host, the mischievous, oft-villainous, perhaps murderous, always iniquitous Swami of House Me, first of my name.

Most of those who partake this year are returners, and as such returners know well the Two Staples and Five Rules of the Swami Pool. The Rules are there to help and guide you, to assist you in your significant quest to stay one step ahead of the Reaper himself, who always and ever lurks in the shadows, awaiting your falter. But how, you say, how best to avoid the black-cloaked scythe-wielder? How best to ensure you are the one left standing when the dust settles?

The Five Rules hope to guide you through to the promised land. Rules are made to be broken, 'tis true, and more rules than one cares to admit will be broken this weekend -- even more than last season, which sought to set a record -- but still you must know them, still you must lay your head on the pillow and remember them, still you must strive to let them keep you safe.

The Five Rules for making selections in the Swami Pool are as follows: (1) Never pick a road team; (2) Never pick a team playing a team within its own division; (3) Never pick the Chargers prior to Week Six; (4) Never pick the same team with all five of your entries; and, most importantly, (5) Never pick against the Swami's orange and aqua Beloveds, lest you risk the Swami Hex. Know ye, and remember: it is written in sand and stone and fire that no participant who picks the Dolphins to lose shall ever win the Suicide Pool.

*Week One 2017 Caveat: this week deserves to have its own caveat. There are no easy matchups and the NFL schedulers have seen fit to have many, many divisional matchups -- more than we have seen in Week One in a long time. Week One is always tough -- case in point, many participants crashed and burned already on the Patriots on Thursday night (no one apparently remembered that the Chiefs were an extremely popular Week One pick last season). But the action otherwise is all over the place.

The Two Staples of the Suicide Pool are the Root of the Week and the Taunt. In the former, the Swami lays down his own weekly pick in advance of Sunday play, as well as the trending popular selections (and while the NFL has dropped Roman Numerals, not so shall the Swami's Root). In the latter, he taunts all those who perished the weekend prior with a mid-week blog post and group email. The Swami, you will come to know, loves chaos, and relishes it.

Rules are made to be broken, however -- and while the Swami breaks far fewer Rules than any other, Week One will need to invoke the Caveat. Swami, and indeed the whole Swami Clan, will be breaking Rules right along with the rest of the masses.

Swami and the Spawn will take Pittsburgh, as we go all-in on Steel Town and entirely against the lowly Land of Cleve, Darth and the Factor will fly with the Dirty Birds to best the Hibernating Bears, and our newest participant Avery of Avalor will shine her princess light on JJ Watt and the Lonestar flag. Because Blake Bortles.

And so, once more without further ado, I declare this newest season of the Swami Pool officially open.

That is all.

Welcome to the Swami Pool of 2017 ... Better Late Than Never

Well ... did you?

Hello my lovelies, my beautiful people, and my apologies for making you sweat the return of our beloved Swami Pool into this sweltering September. The wait was long, but as a wise man once said, better late than never, and so here we stand at the start of the journey, ready to ring the bell to announce the return of the NFL Suicide Pool, and yours truly.

Are you recovered from your 2016 Swami Pool campaign, ready to throw yourself back into the waters of chaos and devastation that only the football season knows? Ready or not, recovered or not, time waits for no man ... or as another wise Seaworth once said, no one curse words you harder than time.

And so, as they say, to business.

Let this post serve as your official reference point for all things related to the Swami Pool. The Pool has a simple premise: you pick the winner of one single NFL game each week (straight up, no point spreads) and if the team you choose wins their game, you advance to the next week.

If your team loses, you take a loss, and in the Swami's Pool two losses eliminates you from competition. You may not pick the same team twice during the regular season (see below for special playoff rules). There are additional details, of course, but the above is the general gist of things.

That's it, although you are still highly encouraged to read the following in-depth breakdown in its entirety, even those who are experienced Swami Suicide Pool veterans.

(1) Entries - Each participant may enter a minimum of one (1) and a maximum of five (5) entries.

(2) Picks - You pick the winner of a single NFL game each week. No point spreads are involved, which means you pick the straight-up winner. Please note that ties count as losses. Kindly email your weekly picks to SwamiSuicidePool@gmail.com.

(3) Deadline -You must get your pick in by the start of your chosen team’s game (kick-off). If you neglect to send a pick in a given week, the default pick is the home team for the Monday night game. If you have already used that team, the Monday night visiting team is your selection. If you have already used both teams, you lose.

(4) Format - This is a double-elimination tournament; you are allowed one loss. Uno, dos, adios!

(5) Disputes - If rule clarifications or amendments are required mid-season (unlikely) or in the event of disputes (also unlikely), all decisions made by the Swami are final.

(6) Updates - An update email will be sent each week with the number of surviving players, the coming week's schedule of games, and pick selections from the previous weeks. The update will usually come Tuesday, although the Swami reserves the right to stretch it later into the week, if needed. You can also check this blog for the update. Additionally, the Swami will post his own weekly pick on Saturdays prior to Sunday play, lest he picks the Thursday game, in which case twill be posted on the Day of Wednes.

(7) Playoffs - The playoff structure for 2017 is identical to the format used the past seven seasons. Starting in Week Ten (10) of the regular season, any team chosen by a participant is NOT eligible to be selected in the playoffs, where the standard Swami Rules will apply (i.e. you select one team to win per weekend playoff round). Teams chosen in Weeks One thru Nine (1-9) will be available to be re-selected in the playoffs.

Kindly address questions to the Swami at SwamiSuicidePool@gmail.com.

And so I will leave you all for the time being as I retire to the sanctity of my inner sanctum; my robes and my crystal ball await, my all-seeing eye is twitching, and the Reaper waits beyond yonder door, at the ready should I stumble. I will return in short order with the first Root of the Week as the world waits eagerly on the eve of gridiron battle.

Let the Swami ride again.

That is all.