The Root of the Conference Championship Playoff Round

Surely the good lord would not interrupt the greatest season in the history of the Spawn's life? So sayeth she, and so sayeth the good Rev, as our fearless foursome marches forward into battle for the 20th time this season.

For those keeping track at home, the surviving group is collectively 76-4 in picking winners this 2014-15 NFL season. Those be some mighty fancy numbers, and that's why they survive, and you are sitting home on the couch watching.

The Spawn is unfazed by her ill fortune last week. She merrily rolls forwards with the weight of the world on her shoulders: Patriots, Colts, Packers, Seahawks. Who to choose, who to choose.

In classic Spawn style ... the Patriots. Onward.

That is all.

Wednesday Taunt - Divisional Playoffs Round

We are down to our final fantastic four.

By virtue of the egg-laying in Denver, we bid adieu to Monkey, Hitman, and J-Ro, as well as to the unscathedness of the Spawn. We have four left, all with one loss, as we move forward to the Conference Championship Round of the NFL playoffs. Only two more games remain in the 2015 season.

Four left: Shiner, Pillow, Junior, and the Spawn.

Only time will tell which of the four will claim the solo mantle, or if we push forward into another year with a shared championship. Flame on, folks, it's clobberin' time.

That is all.

The Taunt at the End of All Things

We come to it at last. The end of all things, the end of the season, the end of 2012 Suicide. We have no homoerotic hobbits lying on rocks amidst cascading molten lava, so instead we must make do with memories of the dulcet tones of Mr. Vin Scully, whose words are so apt for the moment.

"In a season that has been so improbable, the impossible has happened."

So much action in the Conference Championship weekend, and much carnage along with it. The Falcons dropped three and the Patriots dropped one, and four participants -- including two dogs and the last two remaining undefeateds -- find themselves stranded on an island of no picks, and must settle for 7th place.

And yet . . . and yet . . . there will be a winner --- or winners, as the case may be.

Upon analysis of the Suicide Pool spreadsheet, the following two possible scenarios have been determined in the Suicide Pool for the big prize:

Ravens Win -- A five participant split-pot would ensue, with Mumsy, G-Pa, Shiner, CB, and Monkey sharing the top prize.

49ers Win -- Festivus Monarchus would claim his crown, and the mantle of sole title-holder.


Upon analysis of the Second Life spreadsheet, the following two possible scenarios have been determined for the booze-bracket title (where four fell by virtue of Pats or lack of picks):

Ravens Win -- Shapeshifter is the one and only winner.

49ers Win -- Wishful Thinking is the one and only winner.

It seems eight lives will hang in the balance come Super Bowl Sunday, when the brothers Harbaugh face off. Either way, when the dust settles and the champions are crowned, it will be seven long months to our next Suicide adventure.

That is all.

Thursday Taunt - Divisional Round

In a weekend that saw three teams selected, the Patriots, Falcons, and Broncos, I have to admit the Broncos were not the team I expected to fall. Nor did the masses, as it seems most were saving the Manning's Mile High Club for later playoff use.

Which is why we only lost two, leaving fourteen.

Two participants, only two, selected Denver, and so we bid adieu to Her-Turn, always a stalwart, and the ever tough Back Nine Ben, a former champion.

The pool is thinning, but not fast enough -- house money these days says the pool will see it through to and past the Superbowl. With two undefeateds and twelve one-lossers, many of whom have two or more teams still available, it is likely we will have multiple winners at the end.

How then to divide up the spoils?

There is a twist this week for the Conference Championship games: each remaining participant must pick the winner of both games, and then the winner of the Super Bowl. The additional picks (besides your weekly pick) will act as tie-breakers, in the event we make it past the Big Game with multiple living participants.

Only two weeks left before the months-long drought to next season, satiated only by the brief Madness that comes upon us each year at the outset of spring, and two things we know with certainty: the cream will rise and the weak will falter. 

That is all.