Friday Taunt I

Good lord, you should see what comes up when one googles 'Fallen Saint'. I thought it fitting, of course, given the fallen Saints accounted for over 50 losses on this past first weekend of football. For those counting at home, with the Lions loss and the Steelers tie (loss), that's more than 1/3 of the pool felt the first swipe of the scythe.

The initial update is later than usual; lots of new names and faces to prep. We are holding at 159 entries, a solid number, and just enough to whet the appetite for the long season ahead -- at least, long for some of us. Some of us will certainly feel the uno dos, adios call on Sunday next.

Weekend Statistics
159 participants
97 undefeated at 1-0
67 with one loss
no deceased

The Ravens were popular, although why there were not MORESO is beyond me. Against Nathan Peterman. Still, the Swami and Clan move forth unscathed on the back of Poe's team - and the rocket arm of Flickety Flacco.

Onward we merrily roll to Week Two, when you would be best not to meet the Reaper this week.

That is all.

The Root of the Week I

Hello my lovelies, my beautieus, and welcome to another great and glorious year of the Swami Pool. For those who do not know, the Swami shall visit this space each and every week to post his own particular picks, so as to ensure honesty and transparency in a crazy mixed up world.

There will be witticisms and the occasional reference to this or to that, smiles and laughs encouraged if not required. This particular week, the first week for some, a week yet to come, a week long past, the Swami will roll into the beginning with the men of Poe, who will toil and labor greatly en route to sizable victory over the Ta-Tonka Men of Northern New York.

Normally, the Swami saves Baltimore for a later week and then inserts some fun little paragraph quoting the Raven -- "Nevermore" -- but this week sees the clock turning well into the morning hours, and the bed beckons.

Therefore, and for the newbies, a simple Swami Picks Baltimore for the Win will suffice, along with a comment that many different teams have been picked for this first week, although the Saints seem to be getting significant action, and onward we merrily roll -- those who survive -- into Week Two.

That is all.

The Inaugural Taunt of 2017 - Week One (I)

It was not, shall we say, the smoothest of first weekends. There has been difficulty in the past for people getting through the first weekend, but when fully 20% of participants succumb to loss one in week one, 'not smooth' is one delicate way to describe it.

Face-smacking, palm-slapping 'of all the gosh darn darn' is another.

Week One Statistics

159 participants

124 sitting pretty at 1-0

35 hoping to run the table henceforth

1 loss for Clan Swami, with Avery of Avalor getting Jaguar-ed

0 deceased, because that would be a true feat

The Pool is off and running. The games have begun.

That is all.

The Root of the Week I

Everyone loves this time of year in football. As Outkast tells us, the world in September is "so fresh and so clean clean." It is glorious time, full of new beginnings and new hopes and dreams. As I myself said last year at this time, there is magic in the air -- the kind of magic only the fall can bring.

Ladies and gentlemen, glorious individuals, heroes, villains, lovers, and friends, I bid you welcome once more to the halls of the Swami Pool. Allow myself to introduce myself, your host, the mischievous, oft-villainous, perhaps murderous, always iniquitous Swami of House Me, first of my name.

Most of those who partake this year are returners, and as such returners know well the Two Staples and Five Rules of the Swami Pool. The Rules are there to help and guide you, to assist you in your significant quest to stay one step ahead of the Reaper himself, who always and ever lurks in the shadows, awaiting your falter. But how, you say, how best to avoid the black-cloaked scythe-wielder? How best to ensure you are the one left standing when the dust settles?

The Five Rules hope to guide you through to the promised land. Rules are made to be broken, 'tis true, and more rules than one cares to admit will be broken this weekend -- even more than last season, which sought to set a record -- but still you must know them, still you must lay your head on the pillow and remember them, still you must strive to let them keep you safe.

The Five Rules for making selections in the Swami Pool are as follows: (1) Never pick a road team; (2) Never pick a team playing a team within its own division; (3) Never pick the Chargers prior to Week Six; (4) Never pick the same team with all five of your entries; and, most importantly, (5) Never pick against the Swami's orange and aqua Beloveds, lest you risk the Swami Hex. Know ye, and remember: it is written in sand and stone and fire that no participant who picks the Dolphins to lose shall ever win the Suicide Pool.

*Week One 2017 Caveat: this week deserves to have its own caveat. There are no easy matchups and the NFL schedulers have seen fit to have many, many divisional matchups -- more than we have seen in Week One in a long time. Week One is always tough -- case in point, many participants crashed and burned already on the Patriots on Thursday night (no one apparently remembered that the Chiefs were an extremely popular Week One pick last season). But the action otherwise is all over the place.

The Two Staples of the Suicide Pool are the Root of the Week and the Taunt. In the former, the Swami lays down his own weekly pick in advance of Sunday play, as well as the trending popular selections (and while the NFL has dropped Roman Numerals, not so shall the Swami's Root). In the latter, he taunts all those who perished the weekend prior with a mid-week blog post and group email. The Swami, you will come to know, loves chaos, and relishes it.

Rules are made to be broken, however -- and while the Swami breaks far fewer Rules than any other, Week One will need to invoke the Caveat. Swami, and indeed the whole Swami Clan, will be breaking Rules right along with the rest of the masses.

Swami and the Spawn will take Pittsburgh, as we go all-in on Steel Town and entirely against the lowly Land of Cleve, Darth and the Factor will fly with the Dirty Birds to best the Hibernating Bears, and our newest participant Avery of Avalor will shine her princess light on JJ Watt and the Lonestar flag. Because Blake Bortles.

And so, once more without further ado, I declare this newest season of the Swami Pool officially open.

That is all.

The Wrath of the Tuesday Taunt Returneth

For those who were here last season, and have made the Swami Blog a 'must read' part of the week, you will recall the opening frame of the 2012 Suicide season, in which much was made of parity in the NFL.

The evidence for this claim of parity---and for those who follow politics, and therefore have no knowledge of such things, evidence is the available body of facts or information indicating whether a belief or proposition is true or valid---was in the form of 16 teams selected in Week One last year, fully half the NFL teams.

Well, I submit again this proposition of parity, and for once we all enjoy a proposition that does not entail my dressing up as Little Bo Peep.

Eighteen teams. That's 18, for the illiterate. More than half the teams in the NFL were selected by participants in Week One of 2013, which means some games had participants on both sides of the battle.

Granted, there are at present 159 participants signed on for this year, a Swami Suicide Pool record, and when the post office is visited tomorrow and a few write-ins are added to the fold, the number will undoubtedly cross the 160 mark. More participants means more potential for utterly bone-headed moves. Like picking against my Beloveds, and yes I'm looking at you, newbie.

Nearly 20% of the field lost its first life, most at the hands of Steel City, whose proud team melted in the bright lights of their home stadium like the Robert Patrick T-1000, beaten down by the mighty, god-like Titans. Well, not really so much mighty, but the narrative plays into the photo above, and so.

Lady Luck lifted the Swami to glorious heights with a Week One win, however, along with 75 other souls as the top Root of the Week. Patriots fans survived, as well, though not without chewing a little bit back in waning moments.

Weekly Statistics
159 participants
128 undefeateds
31 with one loss
18 teams chosen
6 losing teams
1 bet on Cleveland

And so the band plays on as our merry little flotilla launches from port for the wide open seas, and only you can captain your own ship through the dangerous, choppy waters ahead. Will you survive the voyage? Only the Swami's crystal ball knows for sure.

That is all.